Then It’s Settled!

13 Nov

Image result for Russia flag

President Trump visited Vladimir Putin over the weekend and he again asked the Russian President if Russia had hacked the U.S. elections in 2016. President Putin once again responded that Russia had not… and so the question is settled! As far as President Trump is concerned he has asked and President Putin has answered. Putin didn’t do it because he said so.

But U.S. intelligence agencies have long since concluded that there was Russian meddling in our elections…and that Putin was behind it all. So how can all of our intelligence agencies be so wrong? And why are they all still on the job?

However, President Trump has since clarified his position by saying: “As to whether I believe it or not, I’m with our agencies, especially as currently constituted and as currently led, by fine people, I believe very much in our intelligence agencies.”

But then the president added: “I believe that President Putin really feels, and feels strongly, that he did not meddle in our election. What he believes is what he believes.” President Trump then added that he was not interested in arguing with Putin over meddling and maintains that allegations of campaign collusion with Moscow are a hoax.

However, U.S. intelligence agencies have also concluded that the Russians interfered in the hopes of tipping the election in Trump’s favor through hacking, spreading social media propaganda and releasing emails to embarrass Democratic candidate Hillary Clinton.

But the President has tweeted that this is all Hillary’s fault and that it’s the Democrats who most likely conspired with the FBI and other intelligence agencies to fix the election against him.

So in conclusion: There was no collusion with the Russian government to sway the American electorate one way or the other during the 2016 Presidential campaign except when the Democrats colluded with Russia in an effort to do just that with the help of Russian President Vladimir Putin who was definitely not involved in any way because he said so. Putin not Trump…but most probably it was Putin in our election because all of the U.S. intelligence agencies say so and they are all led by really good guys when they are not busy spying on the President. Trump not Putin. who they have been working hard to discredit.

In other news: While visiting Vietnam President Trump told an onlooking crowd of Vietnamese citizens that they were lucky that the young Donald Trump had shin splints during the Vietnam War because if he had been able to serve in the American military America would have won the war because he would have been a very great soldier, perhaps the best ever, and his mere presence would have struck fear into the hearts of all enemies everywhere and that’s what everyone is saying…

Okay, so the President didn’t really say that. I just made it up. But does it really matter what our President says anymore? And that sadly… is what just about everyone… is saying… everywhere.

What Do We Know?

3 Nov

Image result for survey of new tax plan

Tax cuts are coming! Huzzah! But so far no one knows how much or when and recent surveys of taxpayers have shown that most American tax payers have no idea how much money they actually pay in federal taxes each year nor what percentage of their earnings their taxes equal. Do you? Does President Trump? We suspect he does but he is not telling us anyway.

However the President’s advisers have been arguing that he does not need to reduce federal spending while he cuts taxes in order to make ends meet. Just like you wouldn’t have to cut your home expenses if you lost your job or were forced to take a pay cut because, you know reduced income will stimulate your home economy just like reduced tax revenue will stimulate the US economy.

But according to a new survey conducted at the University of Chicago, Eighty-four percent of all economic experts polled disagreed that Trump’s tax cuts would pay for themselves through increased economic growth. Mostly because it’s never worked before…ever.

Still that is the plan, although it has yet to be finalized by the president and Congress… and most Americans polled believe that they will get screwed and end up paying more in taxes unless they are rich and/or a corporation. I wonder why that is? Could it be that when Asked whether tax cuts since 1980 have ever paid for themselves, no economists argued that they had?

So will it work this time? We will just have to wait and see. The average American’s wages and income have not increased in real dollars (as in kept up with inflation) in over 40 years but maybe, just maybe, this will be the year. They say that the president himself will be looking at a 31 million dollar tax savings just for himself but then again no one really knows how much if any taxes the President now pays (but that’s only because he won’t tell us).

But we do know that the average corporation in the new tax plan will receive a massive cut in their tax rate from 35% to 20%! Will you and I see a 15% reduction in our tax rate? Probably not, but don’t despair because after all, here in America, corporations are people too! and they also have to make ends meet… just like you… Huzzah!

 

 

 

 

 

Nice Work If You Can Get It

23 Oct

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Here is a fun fact…President Trump has already golfed on average 1 out of every 4 of his days in office as The President of the United states. So if he continues on this pace, then after his 4 year term as President, he will have spent 1 full year on the golf course and only 3 years in his office.

And the best part is that he only golfs at Trump golf courses where his Secret Service Agents must rent golf carts in order to follow the president and protect him as he makes his way through fairways, sand traps and other golf hazards. ( I seriously don’t know why they can’t just follow him around on foot? How fast can a 70+ year old play?)

But I digress, because at the current rate of golf cart rentals the Secret Service is spending over $100,000 per year just on that…and all of that money goes into President Trump’s golfing businesses. So that’s over $400,000 for golf cart rentals alone over a 4 year presidency which means that President Trump will not only spend 1/4 of his time in office golfing, but he will also be paid for it in an amount equal to 1 year of his presidential salary.

And if we calculate all of the money spent by the Secret Service renting rooms at his properties etc. etc. etc…and add it to President trump’s income, well, all I can say is…  Nice work if you can get it, huh? And get paid while doing it too!? And while not even working?! And after trashing our former POTUS for golfing too… at 1/8 the frequency!

Wow! America, meet our plutocratic, pietistical, Polytetrafluoroethylene POTUS! Making America (and himself) Great Again…one swing at a time.

Hey Republicans…At least he’s not Obama, right? (wink, wink)

 

We’re All Rich!

22 Oct

Renoir

I’m Rich and you must be too! It turns out that I own an original Renoir painting valued at…a fortune! President Trump says that he has this painting (pictured above) hanging in his home and that it is an original Renoir.

His biographer told him that he was being silly because the “real” original is hanging in the Art Institute of Chicago, or so they have said, since 1933…but I have the same painting hanging in my home too! So who has the really, real Renoir???

Maybe the artist painted several originals that have somehow fallen into all of our hands? Could be? Who’s to say? Do you trust Donald Trump’s biographer who has since been denounced by President trump himself? And Chicago is just a violent, sanctuary city full of fake news, violent drug offenders and killers. Who believes anyone from there?

So it appears as though all… or many… or at least some, of our home wall paintings might be originals! Yours too! We’re all rich! MAGA! Yahoo! Yippee! Eureka!…And this comes straight from the President of the United States, the leader of the free world! Talk about an endorsement!

I don’t know about you, but I’m going to keep my painting right where it is and remain secure in the knowledge that I am wealthy from now on. I’m not going to try to sell it to some fake news and knowledge rip-off artist who’s going to try and rip me off with some made up story about how it’s a copy or something. No way!

I’m loaded now and I’m going to stay that way and brag about it to all of my jealous guests whenever they come to visit me and my Renoir. Besides… if I sell it I’d probably have to pay taxes to some greedy government swamp dwelling hacks. No Thank you!

No sirree! I’m rich I tell you! Rich! MAGA! And thank you Mr. President! Finally somebody is getting something done around here! MAGA! Now, I’m off to catalogue my collection! (You should too!) MAGA!

Big Brother, Can You Spare a REAL ID?

20 Oct

Here is something about America that you may not know…I didn’t but then I’m not much of a traveler. Back in 2005 Congress passed the REAL ID Act, which established minimum security standards for state issued driver’s licenses. And since a driver’s license is needed in order to pass through airport security, you will need one of these new Congress approved licenses in order to board your plane to… wherever.

And you’ll need one by January 22nd, 2018! That’s 3 months from now!

The Act prohibits the TSA from accepting any licenses or (ID Cards) that don’t meet the new standards set by Congress back in 2005. That was 12 years ago…and guess what? Only 26 states have met the new standards, as you can see by checking the map above.

And if the other 24 states don’t receive an extension from the government (and some haven’t even been reviewed yet) then you won’t be able to board an airplane unless you find an alternative form of ID by January 22nd.  So if you live in New York, California, Illinois, Louisiana or Michigan you’ll need a passport even/just to fly within the United States. (The other states have already received extensions…phew!)

Or you could use a DHS trusted traveler card, U.S. military ID (active duty or retired military and their dependents) Permanent resident card, Border crossing card, DHS-designated enhanced driver’s license or a passport card…

And since no one yet knows if more extensions will be granted or if states will comply in time or what the government will come up with next you might want to get busy finding new ID…but only if you are planning on flying the friendly skies in 2018. BYW it takes 4-6 weeks to get a passport so… what are you waiting for?

But the news gets better. (not) Beginning October 1, 2020 American citizens will only be allowed to use REAL ID driver’s licenses or another acceptable form of identification for domestic air travel…

And here, after 62 years of living in the USA, I already thought I knew who I was…and could prove it??? Silly me.

So…what’s in your wallet?

 

 

 

 

It’s Just Business America, Just Business…

9 Oct

Image result for columbus day sale

Today, President Trump’s campaign announced an “exclusive Columbus Day sale,” offering 25% off Trump-branded merchandise.

The Email sent to Trump campaign subscribers wrote: “As leftists push harder and harder to erase our nation’s past, there’s never been a better time to celebrate our history. America’s past is being vilified and stripped away by liberals in the media and our schools — but we won’t stand for it.” …

So there is nothing like enjoying a discount to make you feel better is there?!… Just use code 1492. (for all of you history buffs out there) I kid you not…this is too true to make up.

This of course is not the first time that a President has made a speech on Columbus Day to honor the old explorer, but it is the first time that a POTUS has done his best to profit from it by selling his own merchandise (at discount prices no less!) as though he were representing Macy’s or K-Mart rather than the United States of America…and while bashing at least half of all Americans in the process!

Nothing is worse for America than liberals the media and schools! So let’s all work to make America Great Again by shopping on-line for hats and other crap with our President’s name on it!

Because everyone knows that good old Chris Columbus was not looking for a new world (with Liberals, Leftists, Natives, Immigrants, Newsmen, Scholars, Protesters, Africans, Latinos and Jews in it!!!) He was looking for a way to get to the other side of the OLD world…

…So he could go shopping, of course! MAGA!

 

Who’s A Moron?

6 Oct

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According to reports from several news outlets US Secretary of State, Rex Tillerson, at a meeting of national security officials at the Pentagon, threatened to resign his position over disagreements that he and the President have had over…well, just about everything…and then he called President Trump a “moron.”

But later at a press conference Secretary Tillerson said: “There’s never been a consideration in my mind to leave. I serve at the appointment of the president, and I am here for as long as the president feels I can be useful to achieving his objectives.”

However when asked directly if he had called Mr. Trump a “moron,” Secretary Tillerson said: “I’m not going to deal with petty stuff like that,”…Which of course means that he did call the President a moron.

President Trump supposedly is furious about all of this and apparently believes that we, the people of America who don’t blindly believe in his infallibility are the real morons for listening to and believing fake news reports such as this one.

But really what’s the big deal? President Trump has called people lots of unflattering and insulting names. He called former Secretary of State Clinton “evil”. President Obama was “sick”. Senator McCain a “coward”. Senator Cruz a “pussy”. Carly Fiorina was “ugly”. Megyn Kelly a “lightweight”. Ben Carson was a “liar”. A disabled reporter was “retarded”. The Pope was “disgraceful”. Mexicans are “rapists”. Puerto Ricans are “lazy”… and David Duke?…him he “doesn’t know much about”.

Meanwhile Melania Trump, the First Trophy Wife of the United States, (I could be mistaken? And is that an insult?) is doing her best to combat bullying in the United States??? And hopefully soon she will get to the bottom of it.

So who is the real moron in all of this ridiculous debate? You? Me? Secretary Tillerson? The media? The POTUS? The FLOTUS?

Well, we now live in a country where our President can do and say whatever he pleases about whomever he pleases, and he can do it in real time and on Twitter and then even Tweet that he never said what he said he said, even when we have copies of what he said on our own “smart” (not moron) phones and he can insult entire countries and the peoples in them (including our own!) and with the threat of total annihilation and war and he can do it all without the least bit of…

propriety, seemliness, decency, correctness, courtesy, good manners, dignity, good form, respectability, modesty, protocol, custom, convention, politeness, decorum or good taste…

and he still gets to be our POTUS for the next 4 years???….wait!

It’s our Founding Fathers! They’re THE MORONS!

(sorry Founding Fathers but you did not think of everything!)

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