It’s Party Time!

5 May

Image result for Congress celebrating healthcare repeal with beer

Congress has repealed the Affordable Care Act (ACA) and replaced it with the American Health Care Act (AHCA). All they had to do was take the word affordable out! It was just that easy and also very American. Now let’s all party at the President’s Palace! (formerly known as the White House) There are free buses to and from and beer and selfies!…But sadly you and I were not invited.

Anyway, experts agree that the changes in America’s Healthcare will mean cheaper prices and more healthcare for the young and the wealthy and more expensive prices for the poor and elderly. Huzzah! This is just as it should be!

If you want something you have to pay for it. This is called Capitalism… and if you want something and don’t have the money to pay for it then you don’t get it. It is a very simple and straight forward system. Tried and true.

So naturally our new Healthcare system favors those who can pay over those who can’t because if you want something that you can’t pay for and then cry about it, you are a Socialist and Socialists can go screw and have babies! And a lot of good that will do them because their babies won’t get healthcare either. So rest easy… In case you were worried.

But look at the bright side. If you are elderly then you are close to dying anyway so isn’t spending money on healthcare a waste of money? And if you are poor then what do you have to live for? (especially in one of the most expensive countries on Earth) so wouldn’t spending money on your health be counter productive? And if you are poor and elderly well then… do the words “cost effective” mean nothing to you?

Besides, the United States is number 1 in child poverty (Among industrial nations) and number 1 in the amount of money we spend (Don’t) on helping the poor. (As in LAST)…in case you were worried again. So when it comes to Entitlements this new Healthcare Act is not one of them! Huzzah again!

Because Freedom is Expensive, not Free! It’s expensive when you are born. Expensive when you are alive and expensive when you die. And if we are doing it right it gets more and more expensive as you go along. That’s called business.

And oh yeah, the new bill eliminates The ACA’s employer mandate, which required large employers to offer affordable coverage to their workers. If the bill becomes law, companies that do not wish to cover their workers will face no penalty. It frees all large employers of the complex reporting necessary to enforce the provision and It also pushes back enactment of a tax on high-cost employer health plans.

So take your excess money (if you have any) and put it in your new Healthcare bank account (tax free) and tell the bank to invest it in Healthcare (not yours silly…the business) and Pharmaceuticals and medical devices and even tanning beds! Those businesses are about to go through the roof! If you’re lucky You’ll be able to cash in on the death and dying of others so that you can afford your own future demise.

And if we can get the banks to bundle these healthcare accounts into derivatives and then sell them back and forth to each other until the whole system collapses under its own weight and from sheer greed, then the feds will have to step in and bail out the entire convoluted establishment and we all get rich…if we don’t get dead first!…which of course we most probably will.

Anyway, I digress. Just look at all of those happy, old, rich, white guys laughing and smiling and about to party like it’s 1776! And most of them haven’t even read the bill they’ve just passed (I kid you not) including the big guy in the middle who says that it’s a great, no, very great, piece of legislation.

But don’t despair yet. The American Senate still has to approve this bill and so far they say that they aren’t going to read it either…just disapprove it… and then make their own healthcare legislation. Why? Because the American Health Care Act is…wait for it…too generous!

So party hearty America!…Happier (if maybe not healthier) days may soon be here again…and If you’re an old, rich, white guy… did they ever really end?

 

 

 

 

Es…say…What???

22 Apr

Image result for get your money's worth

When President Trump was recently asked about his and the Republican party’s continuing effort to replace and repeal the Affordable Care Act this is what he had to say:

“The plan gets better and better and better, and it’s gotten really good, and a lot of people are liking it a lot.”

If this were the answer to an essay about the state of healthcare reform in America today that I had given to one of my Freshman English students it would have received a failing grade…not only because it is incomplete and lacks substance, to say the least, but also because it shows an utter contempt for the assignment, the reader and the English language.

Take out the simple and repeated modifiers and you have PLAN GET… PLAN GOTTEN… PEOPLE LIKING.

Pretty bad for a 15 year old. Not bad for a Neanderthal. And absolutely mind boggling, sad, depressing, embarrassing, ridiculous, insulting, inane, thoughtless, contemptible, and uneducated drivel coming from the President of the United States.

President Trump graduated from college with a Bachelor of Science degree in economics! That means he completed at least 16 years of public and private school education in the United States of America. Quite obviously somebody helped him… but in any case…

He did not get his money’s worth…nor did any American.

 

 

 

Are You an Anti-Intellectual?

21 Apr

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President Trump thinks that Korea was once part of China…you know, like France and Russia were once part of Germany. But do today’s Americans really care where a bunch of gooks originally came from?

I know that sounds insensitive of me and like I just used a racial slur but that’s OK now isn’t it? Now that we here in America no longer have to worry about being politically incorrect… which is apparently just another way of saying stupid.

Stupid is in. It’s cool now. It’s so anti-intellectual… and it’s taken the burden off of having to know things all the time. Now we can feel truly free again and not worry about having to always be right, knowledgeable or even educated about the subjects we are talking about… or the things that we are saying.

Like when President Trumps says that he has a task force steaming its way to the Korean Peninsula but it’s actually going in the other direction. Or like when our Attorney General refers to Hawaii as just some island in the middle of the pacific. Or how about when our Secretary of State says “Pon-Yang” like that’s really a place in North Korea? Isn’t that just so rad?

And remember when Press Secretary Spicer called Hitler’s concentration camps Holocaust centers? That was funny wasn’t it? Thank God the days of having to be PC about that war are over, n’est pas?

There are alternative facts now! Finally we can all stand up to the highly educated and tell them to take their knowledge and book learning and truths and stick then where those “Bowling Green Massacre” victims are buried…am I right?

In fact,  a recent survey of college campus presidents by Inside Higher Ed tells us that there is a growing gap between American college campuses and the American public...because about 70% of respondents agreed that anti-intellectual sentiment is growing in the United States.

Pretty cool huh? Especially now that we have an anti-intellectual president to help us lead the charge. No more worrying about what we don’t know, or what we just said or what we just did that might get us in trouble. And spelling??? Like that’s a thing!…From now on It’s full tweet ahead!

Like any insensitive monarch who could care less about what people think of us, we can now hold our heads up high when asked about what we meant about this insult or that, that off handed remark or this, or that bombing or the other and say…Mmmmmmm what was the question??? I just had such a delicious piece of chocolate cake, I can’t think straight!

Isn’t life in Post-Knowledgeable America grand? Let’s all eat some cake!

Only in America?

21 Apr

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President Trump recently signed an executive order to “Buy American, Hire American”, which directs a series of federal agency reviews to identify where the government can “aggressively promote and use American-made goods.” It also directs federal agencies to reform the visa laws, which allow companies to bring in highly skilled foreign workers, in an attempt to create more openings for American workers.

Ironically however, this new order would basically make sure that our government doesn’t buy anything that President trump makes! Because there are at least 12 countries where Trump products are manufactured and they include China, the Netherlands, Mexico, India, Turkey, Slovenia, Honduras, Germany, Bangladesh, Indonesia, Vietnam and South Korea… Not to mention Trump products that have transited other countries through the packaging and shipping process.

And as for hiring American…we also know that our president, as a corporate executive, has hired more than 1300 foreign guest workers to work at his various businesses here in the U.S., including requesting 78 visas to staff his two Florida properties for this year alone. Don’t we have any American workers left in Florida?

In fact Donald Trump, now President Trump, has applied for more than 500 visas for foreign workers for his Mar-A-Lago Country Club/Estate/Southern White House… since 2010.

And wouldn’t seeing President trump’s tax returns go a long way in helping us understand just how much the President of America buys American and Hire’s American like he now wants all of us Americans to do?

For goodness sake…Even our First Lady is from a foreign country! But at least she’s married to the President and wasn’t hired by him…(wink, wink)…

This would really make a great reality show if it wasn’t really reality…wouldn’t it?

 

Around America’s East Coast in 80 Days

12 Apr

Image result for President Trumps travel to Florida

In his first 80 days in the White House, President Trump’s six weekend trips to Mar-a-Lago, his private club in Florida, have cost around $21.6 million. That’s according to CNN, that fake news outlet. So can their numbers really be trusted? Probably because these are actual factual numbers that can be checked by anyone with access to a calculator, pencil and paper, abacus and normal working human brain.

Meanwhile our most recent President, Obama, spent close to $97 million on travel during his entire presidency! And that’s according to Judicial Watch, a conservative government watchdog. At President Trump’s current vacationing/golfing/spending pace he’ll spend around 777 million dollars (680 million dollars more than President Obama) if he lasts 8 years in the presidency.

That’s almost 1 billion dollars! Or 8 times the amount that President O. spent… which by the way, caused Republicans to go positively apoplectic. Now however, no one seems to care in the least that our President spends only half of his time at the White House and the other half vacationing in Florida…and at extra taxpayer expense.

Nor does anyone seem to care that our First Lady refuses to live in the White House also, preferring to live in NYC at a cost of millions more in tax payer dollars…not to mention the millions of additional dollars that the states of New York and Florida have to shell out in security costs for our itinerant first family.

Doesn’t anyone remember when Candidate Trump was an outspoken critic of President Obama’s travel and golfing excursions and when he said that he himself would be too busy working hard in the White House for America and Americans to be able to have any time for himself or for his friends and family let alone his favorite hobbies.

And now here he is keeping his promise to make America Great again by having America spend a fortune on infrastructure…his own, that is. Imagine that? Possibly 1 Billion tax payer dollars or more spent on an American President and his wife’s commute to and from home and work!

Thank goodness he’s not also taking a salary, huh? But then he’d have to pay taxes wouldn’t he? Kind of makes you want to hurry up and get your own tax return in by the April 15th deadline doesn’t it?

Aryan Grande?

1 Apr

Image result for NATO

I was watching Charlie Rose the other night and he was interviewing several foreign policy experts who were discussing the future of Europe and the free world, when one of the pundits brought up the possibility that with England leaving the European Union and President Trump and the United States discussing a pull back from NATO and the lessening of foreign aid to Europe, then who would become the leader of the free world…at least as we have known it since World War Two.

After all he said, it was England’s and The United States’ idea to rebuild a strong and peaceful Europe after WWII to offset the rise of a more powerful Russia and the East to guarantee the peace in a European realm that hadn’t experienced a peaceful partnership in hundreds of years preceding this new “Pax Americana”, post 1945 to the present.

The general consensus of the group was that if England and America are now both disinterested in the future of a European Union that they helped create, and with France also on the verge of an election that could lead to their withdrawal from the E.U., then the new leader of Europe and the west would be… Germany!

Wow! Imagine that?! 70 years after the end of the most devastating and world wide conflict in the history of mankind, Germany,  the once great Aryan architect and instigator of that conflagration, might find itself as the 21st century’s leader of the Free World?!

And seemingly all of this is happening because Both England and the USA, along with many European nations, are suddenly afraid of Muslim immigrants (and others) polluting their most sacred national identities? (Ever hear that before?)

And the winning of WWII by our “Greatest Generation” was important because?…Anyone???

 

 

You Want More?!

24 Mar

Image result for sad healthcare stories

The Republicans in Congress are having difficulty passing their replacement healthcare bill for the Affordable Care Act. It seems that many Republicans find the new healthcare law to be too generous. House Speaker, Paul Ryan has even offered to make additional cuts to satisfy the Republican upstarts who won’t settle for less than an all out repeal of the ACA… You know, exactly what the American people want and have mandated by electing them.

Here is the list of the frivolous health benefits that health insurers are required to provide under the ACA that the Speaker has offered to have removed from the new bill:

• Ambulatory patient services (doctor’s visits) • Emergency services • Hospitalization            • Maternity and newborn care • Mental health and substance abuse disorder services,            • Prescription drugs • Rehabilitative services and devices • Laboratory services • Preventive and wellness services, and chronic disease management • Pediatric services, including oral and vision care

Wow! Who needs that stuff?…But still the watered down porridge of a bill could not receive enough votes from Republicans. Why, you may ask? It still left too many benefits intact! It wasn’t a repeal!

President Trump is demanding that this healthcare plan be passed by Congress tomorrow (at the latest) or else he’s done with healthcare and the nation can go scratch! (as in Beelzebub?) (As in “This is going to be the best healthcare plan ever! New and improved and cheaper! And now with better care!”… ???)

Anyway, what’s a political party to do with a nation that wants to visit their own doctor when they are sick??? And at these prices?! Have you seen what doctors charge nowadays? (Most Congressmen haven’t…but they’ve heard!) And it’s much too expensive for people who are…Non-Congressmen!

But Even with their proposed cuts the National Budget Office says that about 151 billion dollars will be shaved from the national deficit… in a budget that sees half a trillion dollars in payment to the National Debt!…every year! (Now that’s saving some real chump change)

And now we pause for a brief excerpt from Oliver Twist, by Charles Dickens:

‘Please, sir, I want some more.’

The master was a fat, healthy man; but he turned very pale. He gazed in stupified astonishment on the small rebel for some seconds, and then clung for support to the copper. The assistants were paralysed with wonder; the boys with fear.

‘What!’ said the master at length, in a faint voice.

‘Please, sir,’ replied Oliver, ‘I want some more.’

The master aimed a blow at Oliver’s head with the ladle; pinioned him in his arm; and shrieked aloud for the beadle.

The board were sitting in solemn conclave, when Mr. Bumble rushed into the room in great excitement, and addressing the gentleman in the high chair, said,

‘Mr. Limbkins, I beg your pardon, sir! Oliver Twist has asked for more!’

There was a general start. Horror was depicted on every countenance.

‘For MORE!’ said Mr. Limbkins. ‘Compose yourself, Bumble, and answer me distinctly. Do I understand that he asked for more, after he had eaten the supper allotted by the dietary?’

‘He did, sir,’ replied Bumble.

‘That boy will be hung,’ said the gentleman in the white waistcoat. ‘I know that boy will be hung.’

Nobody controverted the prophetic gentleman’s opinion. An animated discussion took place. Oliver was ordered into instant confinement; and a bill was next morning pasted on the outside of the gate, offering a reward of five pounds to anybody who would take Oliver Twist off the hands of the parish. In other words, five pounds and Oliver Twist were offered to any man or woman who wanted an apprentice to any trade, business, or calling.

‘I never was more convinced of anything in my life,’ said the gentleman in the white waistcoat, as he knocked at the gate and read the bill next morning: ‘I never was more convinced of anything in my life, than I am that that boy will come to be hung.’

And so what will happen in tomorrow’s chapter of American Healthcare? As always, stay tuned! Perhaps with a promise of 5 bucks per person some other country will take our excess poor citizens off of our ruling class citizen’s hands? Doesn’t someone need an apprentice??? ( OK we’ll make it 400 dollars adjusted for inflation but that’s our final offer) We’ve got to be in Mar-a-Lago by Saturday morning!

 

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