Apocalyptic Apptitude

8 Aug

 

Today I received this Email message from a Republican website.

Dear Patriot,

There is a huge, hushed-up conspiracy that will wipe out 281 Million Americans in the next 6 months.The media has been forbidden to report anything about it. But at this very moment, the final part of this sinister agenda is being carried out…

…and this will bring God’s Judgement onto America.

But for 37 dollars you can buy the book that will explain how to survive it! And of course this disaster is going to happen because of President Obama and his sinister administration…

But seriously, why would you buy this man’s book or believe that the information in his book could help you survive over 90% of America’s population being wiped out! And why is he so avidly trying to sell books to raise money for a future where money will be useless? Hmmmmmmmm? NOT TO MENTION: 90% of America’s population is going to be wiped out!!! With only Republicans like you left???

It just begs the question: Who will do the cleanup???…Doesn’t it?

I used to love watching Jimmy Swaggart and Tammy Fay and Jim Bakker raise all of that money by trying to help other folks get into heaven. You’d send them all of your hard earned money to help ensure your future in paradise and they’d spend all of that same money on earthly desires like cheap whores, mascara and jewelry…and hardly anyone ever saw the irony.

This is where I like to think that a good education comes in handy. Read! Think! Question! Observe! Think critically!

And even if you consider yourself to be more of a spiritual person rather than an erudite one, and would rather ask yourself what Jesus would do, then by all means be my guest…Jesus may sacrifice himself to save your immortal soul but he would never, never, ever …ask you for money for a book on how he was going to do it.

Now would he?

 

5 Responses to “Apocalyptic Apptitude”

  1. avwalters August 8, 2014 at 6:28 pm #

    I’m no expert, but I can’t say that Jesus was a “fear-marketing” kind of guy. (Wrong volume) But then, “inclusive” isn’t a strong seller in the apocalyptic genre.

  2. salpal1 August 8, 2014 at 10:19 pm #

    if only the republicans who buy into this fear theory survive, I think I might be ok being part of the 90% who don’t. jus’ sayin’.

  3. momshieb August 9, 2014 at 12:22 am #

    Sick. Sick. Sick.

  4. Dan Hennessy August 9, 2014 at 6:56 pm #

    Well , God works in mysterious ways . Maybe he told the Republicans his plans ; or , at least , this guy . Might as well cash in while the world goes to hell , I guess .

  5. womanseyeview August 10, 2014 at 7:23 am #

    Hmmm – you raise an important question of cleaning up after the apocalypse … Maybe the answer is in the book…

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