Archive | 2:10 am


11 Feb

College football star, Michael Sam, recently announced that he is gay and because he is almost certain to be drafted, he could soon be the first openly gay active player in the National Football League. So naturally this is a matter of major concern to big strapping male jocks all across America. Why?… Mostly because men are idiots (just ask women)

But more importantly my question is…why must male athletes always shower together? In one big giant shower room? Who else does that? Prisoners? And who invented the communal shower room? Caligula?

I mean really! If guys are so worried about other men’s sexual orientation…

Then stop showering with other men! And/or stop making them shower with each other…and you!

The photo above is from the Dallas Cowboy’s state of the art multi-zillion dollar football stadium. You’d think that they could afford separate shower stalls… with doors even…for their multimillionaire employees. After all the Cowboys do earn over 1 billion dollars a year as an NFL football franchise! Do they have a portable black and white TV with rabbit ears hanging over the stadium? No! They have 2 state of the art 13,000 square foot high definition video monitors…so what’s with the shower room that looks exactly like the one I was herded into like a terrified wildebeest when I was in high school?

And  why communal showers anyway? Do you shower with your co-workers after a hard days work together? If you’d like to, then go ahead and suggest it, and see if you have a job tomorrow.

What other career do you know of that requires everyone changing and showering together as part of its job description?

I remember being in the 7th grade and suddenly learning that one of the prerequisites to being a high school athlete was showering with other naked guys. This was apparently supposed to be some kind of tribal rite of passage…although no one told me what tribe we were suppose to be in.

Judging by the highly sophisticated and intellectual coaches we had… I’d say it was the Homo-Genius tribe!

Haven’t Sports evolved?…So when will men?



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