XX-Men?

4 Apr

Hey ladies! Is this not good news? Professor Jenny Graves, one of Australia’s leading scientists, believes that women will ultimately outlast men. Graves bases her prediction on the knowledge that the male sex chromosome suffers from an inherent fragility…besides not being able to get any!

Apparently women have 2 X chromosomes with 1,000 genes apiece while the male Y chromosome of which all males have only 1 has been diminishing to a current 100 genes… and without a bullet, so to speak. In the case of humans, a single gene on the Y-chromosome acts as a signal to set the developmental pathway towards maleness which must be why we never ask for directions…we have only one way to go!

What’s worse, since men only have one Y chromosome, losses can’t be repaired the way they are in women, who’s two X chromosome’s serve as back-ups for each other to patch-up problems. Perhaps this is why men always resort to fighting when trying to problem solve while women only have the occasional pulling of hair…but oh those cat fights!

And since Both males and females retain one of their mother’s X chromosomes, and females retain their second X chromosome from their father, a human female has one X chromosome from her paternal grandmother (father’s side), and one X chromosome from her mother…and you thought it was a mystery why mothers and daughters never get along.

But once the Y chromosome starts to break down in men it begins what Graves calls, “a downward spiral.” Graves goes on to call the remaining genes in the Y chromosome “mostly junk” as a result of “dumb design.” Of course let’s not forget that Ms. Graves is a woman so really, speaking for all men everywhere…what does she know?

But there’s a kicker…it will take over 5 million years for the total extinction of men to pan out the way Professor Graves has outlined. Also, the Y chromosome loses genes in bursts and hasn’t lost any in over 25 million years. So once again it’s just a case of being called in from the yard or away from the game to be told something that isn’t that important after all.

Besides  it’s still very likely that science will be able to produce a solution to this problem before it becomes too big of a deal. After all it’s not like in the meantime men are going to pollute the entire planet or blow each other up with atomic weapons or bankrupt the world with crazy investment strategies…

Women of the world! You have 2,000 X’s each and plenty to spare so what are we waiting for? It’s time to do the research before it’s too late and create the new X-man…the XXYman! We’ll be neater and cleaner and ask for your help and directions and be less likely to always side with our mothers and best of all…Mixed Martial Arts Cat-Fight Cage Fighting! What could possibly go wrong?

3 Responses to “XX-Men?”

  1. A Voice April 5, 2013 at 1:30 am #

    Since it is not likely to show up, despite WordPress notifying me of a ‘duplicate comment,’ I will repost it here.
    ——————
    Provided more females become and act like women, in the sense that being a Woman is a title and not merely something considered given through age, I don’t see a particular reason for males to exist. There is no real point in existing merely to exist, some real function must be served. (One might argue about care for the elderly and infirm. To that I would argue that it makes us better people to demonstrate compassion; it enriches us.) If, in 5 million years, we haven’t come to the point as a species where we can repair genes…well, I’m sure that real women could to a better job of things than males have thus far.

    For fuck’s sake, the United States Congress was a male idea. Then again, the Philosopher King was Plato’s idea and he was a Man. Maybe we just need real Men and real Women?

  2. funnyphilosopher April 5, 2013 at 2:31 pm #

    The chic shall inherit the earth.

  3. Lil Miss Kris April 9, 2013 at 2:18 am #

    If you’ve ever worked in an office full of women like I have you’d know this is not good news!

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