Stop Already!

6 Mar

Winter Storm Saturn Brings Heavier, Wetter ‘Heart Attack Snow

This was a headline that popped up when I googled “Winter Storm Saturn” and well, here I go again…

Hurricane Sandy, whose name I have argued against for just being too damned cute for a devastating storm, was certainly a storm for the ages and it did cause a tremendous amount of damage and grief that some people here at the shore are still experiencing…and I certainly don’t want to make light of that suffering…

but we do not need to start the suffering before the suffering even begins, do we?

Heart attack snow?! I do understand the metaphor but please we need to get back to the good old days of “There’s a storm-a-comin’!” and leave it at that.

Does snow cause a heart attack? Can rain cause drowning? Will fog bring zombies? Does dark of night mean blindness?!

Here at the Jersey shore we are all still shell-shocked as a result of Hurricane Sandy.

And we really do not need to be frightened by any more self proclaimed meteorological experts, thank you very much. We get it. We know what a storm is.

storm  /stôrm/ Noun -A violent disturbance of the atmosphere with strong winds and usually rain, thunder, lightning, or snow.

Is there any other kind? Really?

Can we just call the next storm Uranus please, and leave it at that?


7 Responses to “Stop Already!”

  1. Michelle Frost March 6, 2013 at 5:15 pm #

    They gave the same warnings here, but then went on to say that the warning was for those with existing heart and breathing conditions and to wait two days to shovel if you fall in that category or are at risk. Not all snows are the same, so I guess they were doing it as a PSA for those it might harm if they were to rush out and shovel it.

  2. MikeW March 6, 2013 at 6:41 pm #

    I saw something like this the other day. It was a near catastrophic sounding description of the winter storm, with a forecast of a foot of snow. A foot of snow is extreme? The Dakotans must smile.

    The wind velocity and chill off of the Great Lakes is pretty dramatic. I can see using some dramatic rhetoric about the winds.

    Maybe some help from the Gales of November to the tune of the Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald can lend some poetry to the weather news up NE. The gales “come slashin'” in the “face of a hurricane westwind.” ~credits to Gordon Lightfoot.

  3. mvschulze March 6, 2013 at 10:14 pm #

    Our dog Sandy Paws has been mentally traumatized since late October. She thinks most everybody dislikes her.

  4. momshieb March 7, 2013 at 1:25 am #

    Oh, same thoughts up here in Central Mass, where the headlines are using words like “mammoth storm” and “devastating” and “slamming the coast”. I remember when we used to say “a foot of snow” and then just plan to walk through the drifts to school. We didn’t say the word “storm” until we got to at least 18 inches of snow.
    Bunch of wimps we are now!

  5. TamrahJo March 7, 2013 at 2:35 pm #

    While I disagree with the medias’ seeming need to make everything that happens the next ‘big disaster’ (whether it really is or not) the term, “heart-attack snow” actually refers to the heavy/wet spring snows that require much more exertion to move than the colder, lighter snows we get in winter time – – –

    I guess the phrase didn’t bother me that much, because it’s used in my family as an indication of what kind of snow we got – – rather than doom and gloom weather forecasting 🙂

  6. hafong March 7, 2013 at 11:40 pm #

    We’ve had hard attack snow up here this winter! And it does feel like that. If it doesn’t stop soon, I don’t know…..

  7. lifeofimpact March 10, 2013 at 2:33 pm #

    Haha I love your writing! This is my fourth post of yours in this one sitting and I have ‘liked’ all of them and shared one to my network already. I’m excited to continue reading your unique perspective and witty word play. Thanks for things of substance!

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