Adopt A State! (Or more Math Fun)

10 Sep

So…The wealthiest 400 Americans have 1.37 trillion dollars between them. And according to the most recent survey by the National Association of State Budget Officers (NASBO), the 50 United States and the District of Columbia spent a little more than $1 trillion in state revenues in fiscal year 2010.

That means that the 400 wealthiest Americans have more money between them than the 50 United States (plus the District of Columbia) do! They have 370 billion dollars more! And when you consider that the 50 United States (plus the District of Columbia) are facing a 350 billion dollar shortfall this year…well then the 400 wealthiest Americans really have 720 billion dollars more than the rest of us poor folks have to spend on the things that we need (and maybe some things that we don’t need…just sayin’)

But don’t despair because here’s some advice from the wealthiest woman in the world (not an American….the nerve!) Australian mining tycoon Gina Rinehart: “If you’re jealous of those with more money, don’t just sit there and complain, Do something to make more money yourself — spend less time drinking or smoking and socializing, and more time working. There is no monopoly on becoming a millionaire, Become one of those people who work hard, invest and build, and at the same time create employment and opportunities for others.”

Now if we apply Ms. Rinehart’s theory and if the 400 wealthiest Americans have 1.37 trillion dollars between them then why not have them “Adopt a State!” We can divide 400 by 50 and have 8 billionaires adopt one state apiece. Then we can ask them to “HELP” By paying off some of our debts for us. After all they have most of the money! In fact they have more money then all of the states combined…and that’s just 400 people out of over 300 million people. Wow! We can call them “Super American Patriots” and we could show them our love by letting them change the states names or erecting statues and plaques to honor them or whatever they’d like. After all they have MOST OF THE MONEY! And since they would be adopting us we’d be like millions of Little Orphan Annies and they would be like 8 Daddy Warbucks and we could all sing and dance and rejoice in their patriotism and love for us. And one of them could get to be president. Why not? After all they do have most of the money and with their aggregate wealth increasing every year and the states going further into debt every year…well, it seems like a no brainer to me…

But maybe I’m wrong and the answer lies in not why people are rich but rather in why people are poor? Ms. Rinehart blamed what she described as “socialist,” anti-business government policies, and urged Australian officials to lower the minimum wage and cut taxes. She said: “The millionaires and billionaires who choose to invest in Australia are actually those who most help the poor and our young, She added: “This secret needs to be spread widely.”

So now that it’s out there. Let’s go America’s Billionaires! We already know that you’re the ones who help us the most with your largess, kindness  and generosity so please Adopt a state!

Oh and by the way, Ms. Rinehart made her money the old-fashioned way. While you and I were sitting around drinking and smoking and socializing and complaining (instead of working hard)… She inherited it. Her family iron ore prospecting fortune of $30.1 billion makes her  the richest woman on the planet. Can you guess who the richest woman in New Jersey is?

Isn’t Math fun? (and you wondered why you were forced to study it in school)

5 Responses to “Adopt A State! (Or more Math Fun)”

  1. gpicone July 3, 2014 at 12:59 pm #

    Reblogged this on ipledgeafallegiance and commented:

    It’s been almost 2 years and things aren’t getting any better…or fairer…

  2. The Crazy Crone July 3, 2014 at 2:58 pm #

    I was going to mention Gina Rinehart, being Australian. She is a super-greedy woman, a bully who tries to manipulate and control people with her wealth, aiming to cut wages and working conditions for workers, but money hasn’t brought her happiness – her family is falling apart and she is so paranoid about people liking her for her money, that she wants to control everyone. I’d rather be much poorer, happily married and content with life than the miserable circumstances in which Rinehart lives, however wealthy she is.

  3. Ravi Chander July 3, 2014 at 3:31 pm #

    Reminds me of this »
    “Qu’ils mangent de la brioche” – Marie-Thérèse, the wife of Louis XIV
    (the “Let them eat cake” quote erroneously attributed to Marie Antoinette)

    and this »

    “That’s why they call it the American Dream, because you have to be asleep to believe it.”
    ~George Carlin

  4. avwalters July 3, 2014 at 5:40 pm #

    I wouldn’t encourage the “adopt a state” plan. They’ll fight over who gets the “good” states and then they’ll think they have title.

  5. womanseyeview July 3, 2014 at 10:31 pm #

    They may actually be getting worse!

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