Word Fun Facts:

5 Sep

Here is a short list of words that all teachers and all would be teachers should become familiar with and immediately STOP using in class. This is just the short list. I’m sure there are more that I have missed or omitted or that have evolved beyond recognition even as I am typing this paragraph! These are regular, plain old ordinary words But Beware! If you are a teacher or have ever thought about being a teacher you definitely will want to familiarize yourself with this list!

Words Every Teacher Should Never Use in Class

Balls

Screw

Gay

Laid…or any form of the verb to lay or lie

Lay…in case you weren’t listening

Shaft

Leak

Fondle

Fondue…sounds like fondle

Caress

Pussy…as in cat…or pussy

Hoe

Ho!

Ho! Ho! Ho!

Eat

Ate

Dick

Dicker

Prick

Cock…as in chicken…or cock

Cockatoo…as in the bird or…You’ve got a cock too?

Cocktail…the drink the sauce the dress…doesn’t matter

Cocky

Cockles

Cockapoo…you’re really asking for it now!

Cockeyed…a dead word. Don’t bring it back or you’ll have some explaining to do!

Willie…if you have a student named Willie, just leave him alone.

Shaft

Stroke

Joint

Blunt…as in blunt force trauma…or let’s be blunt…

Suck

Sucker

Sapsucker

Sack

Sad sack …why is your sack sad?

Sex

Head

Come …or any conjugated form

Threesome…as in three people…or threesome

Thong

Thongs…beach shoes

Throng…sounds like thong and they will have no idea what a throng is anyway.

Crack

Ass…as in donkey…or ass

Asinine…Did you say your ass or mine?

Mike Hunt…definitely never call this kid’s name… Go ahead try it! (If there is actually a student in your school by this name, pray that he is never in YOUR class. If he is just give him an A and leave him alone)

Boob…as in idiot or fool or boobs

Buns…hot, cold or sticky!

…If you can think of any that I’ve missed feel free to add to the list!

2 Responses to “Word Fun Facts:”

  1. Janice September 5, 2012 at 1:52 am #

    oy! who knew you need to watch your words?!?!
    (my daughter’s only comment after her first class session in grad school was “I think the professor hates adverbs. It’s tragic!”)

  2. elizjamison September 5, 2012 at 10:16 am #

    This is so true! Every single semester when my 9th lit class starts Shakespeare, I have to stop while the laughing starts at “Give me my longsword, Ho!” and “My naked weapon is out” etc. etc. And when we do vocabulary words, the word “guise” always messes them up. They mispronounce it to sound like “jiz” which is a disaster.

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